


If You Love Me, Don’t Let Go

by idrilhadhafang



Series: Star Wars Rewrites — Backstory [5]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Father-Son Relationship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Jedi Ben Solo, M/M, Pre-Star Wars: The Force Awakens, some Darkpilot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-29
Updated: 2017-12-29
Packaged: 2019-02-23 19:11:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13196694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idrilhadhafang/pseuds/idrilhadhafang
Summary: After Han gets into a ship accident with the Falcon, Ben is left shaken.





	If You Love Me, Don’t Let Go

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MidgardianNerd](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MidgardianNerd/gifts).



> Disclaimer: I own nothing. 
> 
> Author’s Notes: For MidgardianNerd. I hope you like it! Title from “Unsteady” by X Ambassadors.

The moment that Ben got that commcall from his mother, it was like his galaxy turned upside down. Even the news was inconceivable — Dad, in a ship accident? True, there had been a lot of those happening, but still...

It just couldn’t happen. The Falcon was just untouchable. 

“Is Dad all right?” he said. 

His mother took a deep breath. “He’s in medbay,” she said. “He’s been badly injured.”

 _Dad_ was supposed to be untouchable. It just wasn’t right. It couldn’t be. 

And yet here it was. 

***

Going over to Poe’s house seemed like the most logical step. Even talking to him about it, he saw Poe’s eyes go wide, soft, gentle. Then, “He’ll be all right. You know your dad. He’s a fighter.”

”Yeah.” And yet Ben couldn’t believe it. He didn’t know. A nastier voice in the back of his mind said that Dad was going to leave him, this time for good, because —

Ben stomped on that voice. It wasn’t true. It just wasn’t. It couldn’t be. 

 _And what about Poe?_ the voice said. _He’s a pilot. He’ll leave you too. He’ll die, and you’ll be left alone._

“Ben?” Poe said, softly. “Are you okay?”

And in that moment, Ben embraced Poe tightly. Practically engulfed him in an embrace; yes, considering their respective heights, engulfed was the right word, like Ben could shelter Poe from the outside world for a little while longer. He buried his face in Poe’s shoulder, inhaling the scent of X-wing grease and engines that he’d come to associate with Poe, that he loved so much because it was simply Poe. Sweet, gentle, precious Poe, who was everything to him. 

Eventually, Ben drew away. Tears brimmed in his eyes. Poe wiped them away, kissed gently at them. 

“I...” Ben almost couldn’t get the words out. 

 _I can’t live without you._ And it was true. Even the idea was inconceivable. “Don’t leave me.”

Poe kissed him, and Ben could taste salt. Poe drew away, stroked back a lock of hair from Ben’s face. “Ben,” he said. “I’m never going to leave you.”

***

It was a day later that the Falcon touched down, and Ben practically ran to the hangar, sprinted in fact. Han Solo emerged from the Falcon with Chewie at his side, looking badly scuffed up but he was alive, and that was what mattered. 

“Dad!” Ben said. “I thought you were...” He trailed off. He couldn’t bear to say the words. 

“I’m okay.” Han smiled at him, that familiar reassuring corner smile that Ben had come to love over the years. “Your mother definitely read me the riot act over this. But I’m fine. I’ve seen a lot worse, trust me.”

”I guess.” Ben said. “You scared the life out of me.”

”I’m sorry, kiddo.” 

And Han was hugging him in that moment, and Ben smelled that familiar scent of the _Falcon_. Some — including people at the Academy — called it a junk freighter, but to Ben, it was a home of sorts. No, it was exactly a home. 

Eventually, Han drew away, clapped Ben on the shoulder. “Don’t worry, kiddo. Chewie and I ain’t goin’ anywhere.”

Ben smiled. “I know.”


End file.
